Breaking: Marlins Trade Entire Team to Blue Jays
In spite of not winning the World Series, the Miami Marlins have decided to engage in yet another fire sale. Jeffrey Loria, in his customary fashion, has agreed to the following trade with the Toronto Blue Jays:
Blue Jays Get:
Jose Reyes (SS)
Mark Buehrle (SP)
Josh Johnson (SP)
John Buck (C)
Yunel Escobar (SS)
Adeiny Hechavarria (SS)
Update: Marlins also get: Jeff Mathis (C), Henderson Alvarez (P), Jake Marisnick (OF)
The deal is not yet official, as details are pending. The Marlins may be getting one other player.
Essentially, the Marlins have traded their entire team except Giancarlo Stanton, who tweets:
“Alright, I’m pissed off!!! Plain and Simple.”
In agreeing to this deal, the Blue Jays are taking on about 165 million dollars in total salary, including over 50 for next year alone.
Johnson and Buck are both free agents after season’s end, with Jose Reyes signed through 2017 and Mark Buehrle signed through 2015.
The Miami Marlins – just when you thought they couldn’t be less likable, will gain the services of noted homophobe Yunel Escobar. Escobar struggled in 2012, putting up a 75 OPS+ in his age-29 season, but was fairly solid the year before, posting a .290/.369/.413 line for 4.4 WAR. He is signed through 2013, with a pair of team options that Miami is certain to either decline or trade.
The Miami Marlins were supposed to make a run at a pennant in their new stadium in 2012, having brought in Ozzie Guillen to manage the likes of recent acquisitions Reyes, Buehrle and Heath Bell, along with carry-over stars Josh Johnson and Hanley Ramirez and rising stars Giancarlo Stanton and Logan Morrison.
At this point, everyone who makes significant money for the Marlins has been dealt.
Look for the Marlins to lose 100 games in 2013; for the dozens of fans who continue to provide this miserable franchise with patronage, remember: the only good moments you’ll see will be home runs from Giancarlo Stanton, and even those will be canceled out by this monstrosity.